I know I have earned it
But most days I don’t feel like I deserve this
To the victor go the spoils
Through this mortal coil
Oh, how the years have been so kind to me

Usually when I think back on the years, kind isn’t exactly how I’ve felt they’ve been to me. That was not only the wrong perspective but it was wrong. The years, at least the adult ones, have been very kind to me. It wasn’t until today that I realized why. A friend mentioned that they needed to take it easy on the vacations because their job was getting upset with them for it.

After hearing that I realized I earned all the things that have come my way in the form of success, and while I don’t always feel deserving of it, I am. I earned it because while most people my age are vacationing, and have been for the last decade, I was working. I started working in restaurants at 17 and haven’t stopped. Some people say a vacation isn’t a vacation unless it’s more than 3 or 4 days. By those numbers I haven’t taken a vacation in since September of 2015. I went to Toronto for 5 days to see my favorite band on a reunion tour in their home town. It was the greatest fucking day of my life, but I came back and stopped taking vacations.

In the last decade I went to Niagara falls for 3 days to see a band, and to Portland Maine for two days. The rest of that time I worked and now as I get a bit older and want to take my foot off the gas I realize I can’t, not yet. If anything I need to put the pressure on more.

This generation complains that houses are too expensive, life is too expensive, and while I agree, things are very expensive, you need to be willing to make sacrifices for the things you want in life. If you want to own a house stop going out every weekend.

I bought a house at 24. My parents didn’t help me, they’re poor as fuck. I did it, I worked and worked and worked like a psycho. I didn’t go out a lot, I didn’t vacation a lot, I didn’t buy a lot of things. I worked, I read books about work, I took courses for work.

There’s a quote and I’m going to fuck it up, but it’s something along the lines of “the results you want are in the work you aren’t doing”. You want a savings account? Stop taking trips. You wanna own a house? Stop taking trips. And if you don’t want those things that’s okay, but don’t complain about it.

I’m here to tell you it can be done, if you’re willing to sacrifice. Some day I’ll buy another house, but this one is going to be on a big plot of land with nothing around it. Before that I’ll open a restaurant, I’ll do it by working, and sacrificing. I am taking a vacation this year but it’ll probably be my last one for another decade. I’m good with that because I’d rather get where I want to get than spend that money for short experiences that when you come back from you realize you’re living a life of misery. And I’d rather sacrifice now so that in a decade or two or three, I can stop working and do whatever the fuck I want.

I found the permanent place
Where the skies are gold, not grey
Where I can taste the salt on your skin
And feel the sunshine on my face
We’re gonna run
We’re gonna run, gonna run away from the day

J