Have you ever had your iPhone freeze or not perform its best and needed to do a hard reset? Well I think you can do that for humans too, because I just did it to myself.

Most people reset by taking a vacation, and while I should take a vacation, too much time away from work gives me anxiety, so I do the same thing every year to reset. I go see city and colour. This show and this year was the most special, and I’ve seen the guy at least once a year for the last 9 years.

I met Dallas Green.

What’s fun is most of you don’t even know who the fuck that is or what city and colour is. City and colour is my favorite band, started by Dallas green. I have 5 tattoos inspired by them, their music has gotten me through some of the darkest shit you could think of, and tonight I finally got to say thank you to him. We had a brief interaction and took a photo together. I shook his hand told him my name and that his music saved my life, he said I probably did that myself. He was kind and meeting him was, I really don’t have words.

I had a two hour drive home and in that time I had so much to think about, and we’re about to embark on the best times I’ve had in my young life.

I’ll be honest I almost didn’t go to the show tonight, I was worried I’d get anxious, I didn’t want to drive all that way alone, I was feeling run down and really thought about bailing. The problem was I was going with Alison.

Ladies and gentleman, welcome Alison. This is the woman I speak so highly of recently, she is perhaps the greatest person I’ve ever met, I had or have a crush on her and she did me the biggest favor in the world. She told me she just wanted to be friends. At first it didn’t feel like a favor, but after tonight, I know it was. Now I know she’ll be my best friend for years to come, I know she’s got my back when I meet my hero and literally can’t speak. I mentioned the other day that the hard part about feeling alone isn’t that you feel like you don’t have anybody, it’s that you feel like nobody has you. I know she’s got me. And honestly we’re so close and have so much fun together that a relationship wouldn’t really change a ton, it would just jeopardize how long I can have her in my life.

I went into today feeling a bit blah. Overworked, tired, over it. I leave today feeling reset. Inspired, excited for work tomorrow, excited for the future, excited for all that is to come.

I think between seeing someone be so excited for me to meet Dallas, and actually meeting Dallas, I realized that life is pretty kick ass, and maybe I am stronger than I give myself credit for.

On the bright side Alison took the photos of me and Dallas, so I know whenever I’m acting like squidward, just negative and down, she’ll send me that as a reminder of how fucking cool life is.

It doesn’t mean hard times aren’t ahead, but I don’t think they’ll ever outweigh the good. And if there’s an afterlife, it’s not better than the one we’re living right now.

Where the skies are gold not gray,

J.