I think I peaked yesterday afternoon, in fact I think my career peaked with me. I met the man who’s inspired me more than anyone, Mr. Will Guidara. For the context of anyone new here, Will wrote a book titled “unreasonable hospitality”, and it’s about hospitality, but also going so above and beyond for your guest, much more than they could ever expect.

What a lot of people don’t realize, and what Will really points out, is generosity needs to be intentional. You can buy anyone a drink, pour anyone champagne, those gestures are nice, but don’t carry a ton of weight because they aren’t for the specific person. Let me give you an example of what Will has done that would be considered unreasonable, and something I’ve done that would be considered unreasonable.

One afternoon on a regular day, Will was in the office at his restaurant Eleven Madison Park. He got asked to help on the floor because lunch was busier than usual and his team was in the weeds. He did the best thing any good leader in a restaurant can do. He started bussing tables. As he was bussing a table of four people in New York on holiday, just to eat at some of the best restaurants, he overheard then speaking about their trip, and how amazing it was. They got to go to all the best restaurants, and they were ending at Eleven Madison, Which at the time had 4 stars in the New York Times, and 3 Michelin stars. Then he heard one of them say “but we never got to have a New York City hot dog” and he explains it like one of those moments in a cartoon where the lightbulb goes off above someones head. He brought the dirty plates back to the kitchen and then ran out the front door and down the block to the hotdog guy, he bought a hot dog and ran back to the restaurant. He went to the kitchen and considered his fancy Michelin star chef to cut this hot dog into 4 equal pieces, and plate it like any of their other fancy dishes, with a swish of ketchup, and a perfect swish of mustard, a canel of sauerkraut and a canel of relish. Before their last savory dish, which at the time was a honey lavender glazed duck that had been dry aged 2 weeks that had taken them years to figure out, he brought to the table what New Yorkers call a dirty water dog. The table freaked out, they were beyond excited.

I’ve read this book dozens of times, I listen to it almost every day. I’ve heard that story at least 100 times, and when he told it in person yesterday as I sat in the 4th row in awe, I got goosebumps. He had a few points to the story. First hospitality is not one size fits all, it’s one size fits one. Second, be present, the more present you are the more opportunities you have to make moments like this. Lastly, generosity isn’t about how much money is spent, it’s about the thought that goes into it.

So here’s my story, and it’s much less exciting. One late afternoon I was working the bar at Alcove getting ready for the pre concert rush. It was the night blink 182 was playing if I’m not mistaking. Anyways these two women sit down at the bar and one of them puts a box down that says “Libbey” on it, which I recognize because it’s a common brand of glassware used in restaurants. The woman who put the box down immediately went to the bathroom and I looked at her friend and said “do you always bring your own glasses to the bar?” Her friend said that they were a set of four coupe glasses, that had been on her wedding registry, when she opened the box at her bridal shower, one of the four was broken. They had spent the day going to 4 different crate & barrel’s hoping to find the glasses and exchange it. Apparently, Crate & Barrel not only has terrible customer service, but they also only sell those glasses online. I was on the heels of reading the book and I had my lightbulb moment. At Alcove we had a shelf of mix matched glasses that as bartenders we could use for special drinks, for fun, for anything. I had just brought in a set of four really cool coupe glasses with gold rims, I couldn’t wait to make drinks in them. Instead when the woman came back from the bathroom the four coupes were sitting on the bar top, I said I’d heard what happened and how badly you wanted these glasses. Would you be willing to take this set in place of the set you were hoping to get? She froze “I actually like yours better but I can’t take them” I explained to her that they were actually my glasses, and I’d be so happy if she’d take them, because I knew she’d never forget how she felt in that moment. She accepted and cried at the bar. We served her and her friend two rounds of drinks, and on the receipt, which I think I still have a picture of, she wrote “thanks for making my bad day 1000x better.”4

That was my unreasonable moment, a moment I’ll never forget, and that woman will never forget. The total cost of that moment? $10. It wasn’t about the money, it was about the fact that it was a gesture I could only possibly make to her, it was done with intention, the only motivation behind it was to make someones bad day better.

I have other moments like that, but that’s my favorite one so far. Will always says he truly believes we have the opportunity to make the world a better place through hospitality. He says we can make magic in a world that desperately needs it.

Well, with that being said, after hearing him speak yesterday, and actually getting to meet him, I’d never known what hospitality as a feeling felt like, until he took the time to talk to me, sign my book, and take a photo with me. During our interaction I tried to talk about the book and instead he asked where I worked, and said he couldn’t wait to come back to Boston and visit me. If that day ever comes, I know the gesture I’ll give to Will, that only he would understand.

Seeing him speak got me fired up again like the first time I read the book, now I want to do unreasonable things for people. We had a bad review last week, a woman came in to celebrate her birthday and was disappointed with her experience to say the least. I always check notes on reservations before service so I know what’s going on. Tomorrow we have a woman who’s joining us for the first time to celebrate her 40th birthday. I have an oddly good idea of the ups and downs she’s feeling about turning 40 because my sister turned 40 a month ago. I have her reservation flagged, when she’s seated at her table, there will be two champagne flutes waiting for her and her guest. What she won’t notice is her flutes are a bit different than everyone else’s, they’re made of crystal and have a gold rim. Upon arrival I’ll make it a point to pour champagne myself, and wish her a happy birthday. Upon departure, I’ll make it a point to give her the box that the set of flutes came in, washed, dried and polished, as the flutes are her birthday gift from us at 1928.

Friday, we have a couple coming in to celebrate a gentleman’s 60th birthday. When it’s time for dessert I’ll pour them each a small pour of our single barrel of bourbon, because what better way to celebrate? what they won’t notice is their whiskey glasses will be different than everyone else’s, and on their way out, again I’ll give them a box with two glasses that have been washed dried and polished, for him to take home.

Sunday brunch we have a party of four coming in, and it’s the dad’s birthday. The note on the reservation said dad likes chocolate and blue candles. Before I go in on sunday morning I’ll buy every good chocolate bar you can get, and a few chocolate cupcakes, and blue candles. When they’re finished with brunch, they’ll be presented with a platter they don’t know is coming, and hopefully they’ll freak out with excitement.

These little acts, buying the flutes, and the whiskey glasses, buying chocolate bars and cupcakes. All in will cost me maybe $100. But it’ll create at least 8 core memories for people, and hopefully make them feel a way I’ve never felt at a restaurant. I missed the days of true hospitality, but I’ll bring them back in my own little corner of the world.

“For Jordan, Here’s to being unreasonable. – Will Guidara”

Where the skies are gold not gray,

J.